Encourage, Encourage, Encourage

You know that situation where you hear of something for the first time, like a new restaurant or someone's name or even a word you've never heard - and then you hear about it or see it everywhere? For some reason, once it's been drawn to your attention, it shows up all over the place?

First of all, this has an actual name! It's "Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon" or "frequency illusuion." (I hope that very random piece of information helps you win a trivia night somewhere! And I also hope you see the term Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon again soon to prove that Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon is real. But I digress. As usual.)  

Ok, back to the point. I have been hearing about seeing, and receiving encouragement everywhere I look.  

On Monday I was traveling home from my mom's 70th birthday trip and we spent the night in a hotel to split up the long drive. I was helping my kids make waffles at the breakfast bar and noticed a mom who was alone with twin boys who were about 3, and a little girl who was about 1. Guys, their table was like an actual circus. The 1 year old was pushing the highchair on wheels like it was a toy, one of the twins spilled his milk all over the table and floor, and the other one was standing on his chair.  

There was an older couple with no children sitting next to them, looking a little shell shocked about eating breakfast next to an actual circus, but not unkind. I asked the mom how I could help and she asked me to find someone to clean up the milk. As I walked out to do that, I heard the woman at the next table say "Before you know it, they'll be all grown up." It seemed to be her way of saying, you're ok, this is temporary, and you will miss it. A teeny little encouragement in a soft voice.  

As we were about to load up for the rest of our drive, I went to refill my coffee and saw the circus mom at the coffee bar (you know she needed it!). We chatted a bit and she said "I'd never attempt this long trip on my own with my kids, but my mom is sick and I need to get to her as soon as possible." Imagine the stress and burden she's carrying right now. Imagine how much the kind encouragement from the woman at the next table meant.  

The next day I posted a question on Calm Moms Collective to ask if a stranger has ever made your day, and how. (One interesting note is that I had written the question and scheduled the post the week before to publish that day, so it wasn't a result of what I witnessed the day before. Weird how things like that happen!). All of the comments were about ways strangers had encouraged them when they needed it most. For example, Chelsea said: 

"When my son was 8 weeks old (and very colicky) I flew home to Michigan from South Carolina to visit family. I was so anxious about flying alone with a baby for the first time, but I met the sweetest elderly man that was seated next to us on our flight. He immediately made me feel comfortable, offered to hold things and even ordered me a ginger ale from the flight attendant to soothe my stomach (I'm a terrible traveler)- it reminded me that there are so many good people out there 💙 And to this day we are Facebook friends and he comments on all of the photos of our growing family. He's just the sweetest man and I'm so glad our paths crossed!"

 This comment was extra-special to me, Chelsea is our former Nanny, who helped me so much when my daughter was having separation anxiety and only wanted me. Chelsea patiently won her over and encouraged me that I was still a good mom, even though I worked. To see that someone had done the same for her gave me goosebumps.

 A few days later I went to my daughter's school for a special Veterans Day Chapel. The Colonel who spoke talked about encouragement. He shared that Veterans Day is wonderful for those who serve because they feel encouraged by the support of strangers. He told a story about how the military survives because of the encouragement they give one another, and how they have each other's backs. He encouraged the kids to look for ways to encourage others.

Encouragement was showing up everywhere I looked! I received a lot of it myself, as I put out my new class offering. I encourage my clients when they aren't sure if they can make big changes (they can! You can too!).

I could keep going but you get the point. Encouragement is so important. Encouragement is EASY! It's really just three steps: 

1. Be a good noticer! Listen and look for people who could use a little encouragement.
2. Say a sincere kind word or perform a small kind gesture like buying their coffee.
3. Feel good because you helped someone else feel good! Everybody wins.

See if you start hearing, noticing and receiving encouragement after reading this. Do your best to encourage at least one person today!