Sneaky people pleasing

People pleasing is a sneaky little jerk of a habit. When you people please, you actually are attempting to control other people’s reactions and feelings.

🤣 You laugh at a joke that you think is actually offensive. . . in an attempt to not make the joke teller not feel awkward or see you as “angry”.

😐 You reassure everyone that you are fine, even though you’re actually having a hard time. . . because you don’t want them to worry and you want to be seen as capable.

😷 You show up to work when you’re sick. . . because you don’t want other people to feel disappointed, and you want to prove you’re a hard worker.

The truth is, you can never control what other people think of you, or how they feel. They might already think you’re angry (or not), capable (or not), and lazy (or not). The only thing you can control is how you feel and what you do or say.

I felt really uncomfortable responding to a sexist joke by saying, “I don’t think that joke is funny because it perpetuates the idea that women need to look a certain way and be a certain size to be valued. Men don’t have that same standard. That thinking is detrimental to women’s mental health.”

But it was 100% in line with my true beliefs and my authentic self, and that felt awesome.

Growth is uncomfortable, and worth it.

PS People pleasing is super sneaky and can be hard to stop, but I can help! Set up a (free) session with me to learn more about living life as your true authentic self.