My client Julie is a mom in her 40s with an executive job. She came to me because her life, which looked great from the outside, actually felt overwhelming and out of control. Julie didn't know exactly what was wrong, or how to fix it.

With Julie's permission, I'm sharing her journey from chaos to calm.

Part 1: Pause & Understand the Problem

Our first step was to understand exactly what felt "off" in Julie's life. Her work was miserable because of a toxic boss, her relationship with her partner was strained, even the clothes she wore didn’t feel like her.

In our first session, Julie said "I'm not being true to myself in any part of my life".

A long history of people-pleasing had created a life that made Julie feel stuck. She always put others first, and couldn’t see a way out.

We were clear on the problem.

Part 2: Change thoughts & take action

First, I taught Julie to notice her own thoughts. Julie reported having thoughts like “I’m under attack and I feel like a hostage” at work. I taught Julie how to create new thoughts like “I’m safe and this will be ok” and to think them on purpose.

Julie also began taking action. She cleaned out her closet and got rid of every clothing item that didn't feel like her true self. Her co-workers noticed a swagger in her step. Julie was on her way back to herself.

She began to see that other people’s behavior, including her boss and her partner, had nothing to do with her.

At this point, Julie told me "I'm on the upswing". She could see how changing her thoughts was changing her whole life.

Julie pondered leaving her job, but noticed she wasn’t miserable at work anymore, even though nothing had changed except her thoughts.

Along the way, Julie calmly came to the conclusion that her relationship with her partner was over. This decision made Julie feel relieved, sad, peaceful, scared, furious, and alone. Julie felt each one of these feelings for as long they were present. She understood that emotions are just a feeling in the body, and she wasn’t afraid to feel them.

Part 3: The Results

The biggest shift in Julie is her belief that she deserves to be cherished - by herself and others. Her opinion matters and it’s not her job to make everyone else feel better.

With her new attitude, Julie has:

Gotten a raise (she didn't even have to ask!)
Paid off all of her debts
Sold her house above asking price
Fostered better, more authentic relationships with her family
Learned to ask for and accept help

On our last call, Julie told me “I’m learning how to take care of myself. It’s ok if I’m not perfect at it. I am positively euphoric. I haven’t felt this good about my life in years, if ever."

Is 2021 the year where you’ll change your life? Why spend another year feeling overwhelmed and out of sync? Let’s work together and create a life where YOU feel better than you've felt in years, if ever. Set up a free hour with me to see if my coaching is a good fit for you.

What Life Coaching Can Do: Julie's Story